Feeling feelings

Photo by Rolands Lakis.

Photo by Rolands Lakis.

Hormones make people feel things. Like feelings. Under the current onslaught of hormones I’m feeling feelings. The feelings I’m feeling are the following: orneriness, impatience, frustration. I am wearing the horcrux necklace. I am wearing The One True Ring. I am burdened.

It physically hurts in the morning to wake up and have to accept that the world expects me to leave my bed and be a contributing citizen. I like my work, my walk to work, my colleagues, my apartment, my city, my life, my days, but what actually gets me out of bed is the promise of cereal. Nothing trumps cereal. But then I’m sad again after breakfast because  my next breakfast isn’t for 24 hours and I’d be a horrible parasite host if I ate cereal for every meal.

Every activity between cereal eating is a task, the worst of which is having to choose clothes to wear that are deemed appropriate. This is excruciatingly hard work, and no argument exists that can rationalize this standard that prevents me from wearing a tank top and leggings at all times.  And shoes are stupid. This is what the incurable affliction of hormones has saddled me with (besides barfing).

Sometimes in an effort to stop feeling so many feelings I imagine I’m a sitcom actress playing a pregnant character and all of my feelings and associated behaviors are situational and exaggerated and thus humorous. But so far my imagined audience has been bored and unconvinced and I hate them.

I am comforted – about as equally as I am disgusted – that I can’t do anything about the felt feelings, so at least there’s that. And Captain Crunch. (Which has 100 percent folic acid in every serving.)

I may take up growling.

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2 Comments on “Feeling feelings”

  1. melinda says:

    Love this post! Somedays I would just wake up hating the world. For no reason ofcourse. I would just be mad at everyone my boss, my patients and co-workers. I had no reason to feel this way other than hormones. Lol its a crazy and wonderful thing being pregnant.

  2. Tara says:

    Some days I feel it would be more considerate of me to stay home than to expose others to my crankiness. A baby bunny could hop in the room and give me a cupcake with Pacey Witter’s face on it and I would hate the bunny for making me have to reach all the way down to the floor to get the cupcake.


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